Pain

Omg, it's finished and I still like it, what is this strange magic? 

WIP: Pain

Lately, I've been having a really hard time loving my artwork the way I used to, or just being happy with it in general. I think that's because I've been pushing and pushing to adopt an art stye that isn't mine. I've looked at other artists' works and thought to myself "I want something like that." Those thoughts have subsequently compelled me to draw in a style that I've come to think I'm simply not suited for. I love lineart, and I've often forgotten that just because I use it doesn't mean my art is less than anyone else's.

Bound By String

""As soon as I cross the Bond into his consciousness, I’m swarmed by his thoughts and battered by his emotions. They tangle together and yank at my own, forming knots that intertwine my individuality with his. Suddenly, it’s like there’s no difference between Auburn Dasher and Sapire Knight. "

--DAYDREAMER: Warm Shadows

It isn't often that I draw things related to my book, which I'm currently in the process of rewriting. It's quite the change from when I was younger, before I entered high school, where I only drew the characters and scenes from my book. Then I was introduced to roleplaying and found myself so enraptured by those characters and writings that I became unable to set aside the time to draw things other than those. That's not a bad thing, it's what I enjoy, but it's never a bad idea to spice things up from time to time. With that in mind, I've produced this. 

Believe it or not, the lineart I used for this piece is actually a few months old, although I'm not sure precisely how many months exactly. It's funny though because I actually created this piece based off another WIP (as seen below) that I abandoned years ago, then, after lining the sketch, I abandoned this piece as well. 

I started this piece some time during my Freshman/Sophomore year, I think.

As you can see, there's quite a difference in the original concept as well as style. Initially, I attempted to create a very conflicted composition, but in the rework it evolved into something much more fluid and compassionate. 

The lighting and color scheme gave me a hard time, but amazingly I actually never got frustrated by them at all. It was interestingly enjoyable, which is refreshing given how little I've been enjoying my work lately. All in all, I feel that this was a good change of pace and I'm glad I finished this work in progress.

School Assighment: Evaporate

My 7th concentration piece. Truth be told, I'm surprised I didn't procrastinate more and spend the entire night struggling to get this done in order to turn it in on time. Apparently, I'm becoming responsible...

*cough, cough* thank you best friend who shant be named who forced me to complete my homework, you cool *cough, cough*

Anyway, from concentration 7 onward there will be a slight change to my theme. Whereas before I focused strictly some of the prisons that trap us in every day life, from this point on I'll be looking at how we struggle to liberate ourselves from those very same prisons. So, I guess you could say I'm making sequels to my old concentrations pieces. This piece, is the sequel to Concentration 3; Fade.

This piece focused a lot on things we often associate with our fears; i.e. the dark, shadows, dark water, the night, the moon, so on so forth. I tried to create a sense of hopelessness as you were swallowed by your fears. 

To combat that in in Con 7, I attempted to use a lot of the same elements in a different way. I took the clouds that were originally fading from light to darkness, and reversed their gradient, as well as had them surround the woman almost like a dress that simultaneously was evaporating from her body. This was meant to symbolize her "shedding her fears" and ultimately freeing herself from the prison of her own anxieties. The sun behind her is also a symbol for that, as it represents her freedom and her courage for having finally conquered her prison.

Work In Progress: Evaporate

for my next concentration piece. 

Bound By String Pt. 2

what am I even doing?

Trying weird lighting. 

Let's hope this works.

Fan Art: Aggressor Agrona

I literally never draw fanart. Ever. This is like the third time it's ever happened. 

This character s just like...just look at her. You can't tell me she isn't a badass.

Character belongs to Amarhyllis on Instagram. I believe she is one of the characters (idk if she's good or bad or whatever) in her yet-to-be published novel.

Bound By String

I really wish I had the motivation to finish this because honestly I adore it. 

When I'm not compulsively roleplaying with my bestfriend, I actually do something semi-productive. I'm unsure if I've ever mentioned it or not, but I've always dreamed of becoming an author. You can't exactly do that without writing a book, however. Luckily, little 7th grade me jumped on that bandwagon so the first draft of my first drafts of my first three books have been finished for quiet some time...

...unfortunately they're horrible and remind me of 12 year old fan-fiction. So I've been rewriting the first book for the past four years...I'm almost half way done...

ANYWAY, these are the two protagonists, Auburn and Sapire, and if it wasn't obvious by the super touchy, strange drawing they're a couple. Or they would be if Auburn wasn't such a bitch, but that's not important. 

I'm thinking about coming back to this to finish it, but we'll see. 

Self Portrait

School Assignment: Isolate

So, this might come as a surprise, but this long overdue. The original turn in date was either early December or late November, to give you an idea of how late this is, but I've finally finished it. After turning this in, I should be entirely caught up in my art class and ready to move on to my next piece. 

Once again, my concentration is Everyday Prisons. The prison I chose to explore with this piece is the prison of mental illness. There's this continues idea propagated throughout our culture that unless you've a broken bone or you're vomiting--visible illnesses--then you're not sick. Needless to say, that's an incredibly exclusive concept as there are so many mental illnesses that people deal with every day, but because of this stigma it often isolates said victims because their ailments aren't perceivable to the naked eye. With this piece, I intended to explore how the sicknesses many of us experience in our minds push us away from others and often prevent us from feeling anything other than loneliness in numerous social situations. I did this by putting this young man in a normally populated surrounding, aka school, but removed the usual crowd that would be seen, aka students. Instead of being surrounded by other people, he's surrounded by his illness which in turn spawns from his own mind.

WIP: Ky

My original character looking sharp as fuck with those cheek bones.

Sketch: Sometimes Sex Happens

My friend challenged me to draw a sex scene. I drew a sex scene involving our two characters.

Whoops.

Sketch: Roses

I just decided to attempt something pretty and came up with this.

Secrets I Forgot to Mention

This is anther older piece, though not incredibly so. I drew it something mid-2015, I think and I'm still proud of it. I used a reference off google, and I wish I had it to show. Unfortunately that was quite a while ago and past me didn't think this far ahead. Nevertheless, this was an idea that came to me while listening to a song by Nikki Heaton. I can't remember the name of the song, but it game me this idea to draw my character, Kaya.

Bad Mood

I'm in one. This is my OC. Annie. Being cool.

School Assignment: Pry

(click on it for larger image)

So, winter break ends tomorrow and I'm fairly sure that I have another piece due for art the day we come back. If not, then at least I'm prepared.

As some of you (probably none of you ;-; ) know, I'm exploring the concept of Everyday Prisons in my AP Studio Art class. I've come up with ideas like how our minds trap us, addiction, commitment, fear, but I generally stray away from anything to overtly gruesome or physical. 

At least until this piece popped into my mind.

This is basically a representation of the past and how it often holds so many of us down, the process from which freeing ourselves from is brutally painful and almost impossible. These things are demonstrated composition through the girl being pinned by these shards, many of which hold memories of her life that've all hurt in in some way or another (which is why they've embedded her as they have.) It also signifies the struggle that we go through trying to tear ourselves away from these recollections and the pain accompanied by them by the way she attempts to pull the shard in her arm out. In a lot of ways, she's hurting herself further but also allowing the possibility to mend and grow. 

So, that's my sixth piece in my concentration. Half way done. Six more to go.